| The Levity Zone
Search Engines
Cal's Fishnet
Wav's
& Midis
Email Us
Jokes
Riddles
Practical Jokes
Daily Comic Strips
Email Us

b
|
 
- This joke is for someone's individual room. This works really
good for
people in college. Take thier door off of the hinges. Keep the door shut,
so the only thing that is holding the door in is the door knob. Then run a
line tied to the door knob and run it the heavy rope out of the window. Then
tie the other end of the rope to about fifty to one hundred pounds of bricks.
When the person opens thier door, not only will it open, but it will go
flying away from them.
*make sure that thier is nothing between the door and the winodow.
*make sure nothing is attached to the back of ther door.
- Buy one of those cards that have the small
electronic device that plays a tune....place it somewhere very hard to find in a
colleague's office when she's out (behind a picture, in the bottom of the tissue box....it
will drive her crazy trying to find it.
- Does the person that you want to get even
with drink red wine? If so, have I got one for you! Get yourself some Neutral Red, a water
soluble, crystalline red dye. Mix some into the persons wine and wait for them to take a
leak. Neutral Red comes out as red as it goes in, and people have a tendency to get really
nervous when they start peeing what they think is blood.
- Reprogram the speed-dials in the office of a
co-worker to all call "Dial-a-prayer."
- If someone goes out of town for the weekend
get access to their room. Lay down plastic wrap all over the room. Around furniture, under
the bed everywhere. It is easiest if you remove all furniture then lay down the plastic.
Fill the entire room with sod. Now they have wonderful green growing carpet. :) Replace
all their furniture, exactly how it is supposed to be. Have farm animals moved into their
room right before they get home. Sheep, goats, anything that grazes and is small enough to
fit in the room will work. Lock up and leave. Preferably the country.
- The next time you are having a party, do
this prior to the arrival of your guests:
-
- Take a camcorder and place it on a tripod extended as
high as possible (and on top of a table or box if necessary) so that it is near ceiling
height. Place this in the bathroom (or just outside the door if the bathroom is too small
to afford a wide shot. This shot must include the sink area and the toilet. Select your
accomplice and tape her walking into the bathroom, looking into the mirror, fixing her
make-up and hair and walking back out. Remove the camera and make this tape available for
playback in your VCR.
- Sometime during the party, select your victim
(preferably female - you'll get better reactions). Wait patiently until they go to the
bathroom and when they do, gather EVERYBODY around the television and quickly explain the
joke. Have your accomplice (the one you taped earlier) standing by.
- When the victim emerges from the bathroom, have your
accomplice pass her and enter the bathroom. Roll the tape of your accomplice fixing her
make-up and have everybody watching, really interested in what she's going to do. Observe
with delight as the victim succumbs to the belief that there's a video camera in the
bathroom... where SHE just was!
- For those on Windows 3.1x..... Use Alt + Print Screen
at the Program Manager screen to get a screen image into the clipboard. Paste it into the
Paintbrush and save it as a .bmp file. Get into the office early on April 1st, load it
onto some machines and use it as Wallpaper. Then minimize the Program Manager. Although
the Program Manager will still be visible as an icon people will probably be clicking at
their wallpaper icons for some time before they notice it.
One of the best practical jokes I heard of
recently was the wife who taped the lottery draw one week.Then, during the next week
bought a ticket with the previous week's winning numbers on for her Lottery Mad husband.
The next Saturday evening they sat down to watch the draw but just before it started she
had arranged a short phone call for him during which she switched on the video with the
previous week's show on it. He then returned to see his "winning" numbers drawn
out. Of course, he was delirious.
Hook up the modular phone cord to something
silly, like a lamp, or a potted plant. A lot of people work in offices who have no idea
how phones work, and will more than likely call in a repair guy... who will trace the line
to the plant and make your schmuck look like a... well... schmuck.
Tell someone you can pin a glass
of water to the wall -- a real glass, not a paper cup, using an ordinary straight pin.
Naturally they won't believe, so you set out to prove it.
Get a glass of water and a pin. Hold the glass up to
the wall and start to pin it up. And then drop the pin. You've got the glass in position
just right, so you ask your victim real nice to get the pin for you. When they bend down
to pick it up, dump the water on their head.
This works especially well when there's a crowd of
people watching. It can also be very dangerous for the joker, so be careful if you try it.
PREPARATION (in a restroom
nearby):
- Empty salt ( or pepper) from a previously 'acquired'
container and fill about 1/3 full with concentrated lemon juice.
- Place a thin tissue across the opening, poke it down
a bit to form a depression, and fill the depression with about a teaspoon of baking soda.
- Cover (from the inside) the holes of the top with
tape of the appropriate color.
- Replace top on container and trim visible tissue from
around the top.
Carry the device to dining hall (upright and as
stable as is possible... for your own sake).
After discretely placing the shaker on your table
(only place it near to you... see caveat #1 below), observe the next person to use the
salt (pepper). (S)He will shake lightly at first, then harder as nothing comes out. Due to
the breakdown of the tissue and the pressure resulting from the classic acid/base
reaction, the top will pop off (quite spectacularly) amidst a shower of foam. Your victim
(as will as everyone around) should have quite a reaction, since one does not usually
observe this type of behavior in a salt (pepper) shaker!
CAVEATS:
The top will come off with some force. If the holes
are sealed well, this will happen on about the second or third shake. Once, though, due to
poor sealing, it took about 5 seconds, during which time our victim started looking at the
shaker to examine the "foamy stuff coming out" of the holes... we quickly
grabbed the shaker from her to direct the top towards the ceiling before it went off. So,
watch carefully!
The "foam shower" (lemon juice & soda)
may ruin you victim meal... be prepared to pop for another one.
Don't do this if your victim or anyone near ground
zero is dressed up (this joke will flop at board meetings and the like).
I was once in a nice family-style restaurant
when I observed some kids superglueing the dishes to the table. They also attached the
silverware, napkins, salt, pepper, etc. If it wasn't already nailed down, it was now. They
stayed long enough to let the glue set, and then paid and left. They watched as the poor
busboy tried to get the stuff off of the table.
Also funny is superglueing a quarter to the
sidewalk. I know its old, but in the city, with the diverse types of people around, it
gets really amusing. I watched this old lady whack at it with her cane for about 10 min.
cursing......
Slip some of those anti-shoplifting strips
into the lining of the victim's favorite jacket. Cut out a silhouette of a gun from metal
and hide it in a piece of carry-on luggage.
Put a hot water bottle filled with pea soup
down your chest; sit at a table with other people. Make a loud noise (to attract
attention), stand up, bend over and squeeze your chest. This causes a huge gush of green
liquid to spew all over the table; If you can, have friend(s) eat the liquid off the
table.
Get yourself some Neutral Red, a water
soluble, crystalline, red dye. Mix some into the persons wine and wait for them to take a
leak. (Neutral Red comes out as red as it goes in, and people have a tendency to get
really nervous when they start pissing what they think is blood!
Take the top off the toilet tank. Inside,
there is usually a vertical plastic pipe about 1 inch in diameter. Going into the top of
this pipe is a little plastic tube. Turn the tube outward and, if it is long enough, then
put it toward the toilet bowl with the end just sticking out. Replace the tank cover,
making sure that the little plastic tube is just sticking out. When someone flushes, the
tube will squirt water.
Ask your victim to take a quarter and place
it on a piece of paper. Then ask him to take a pencil, and without removing his finger off
the quarter, to draw a circle around the quarter. Have him repeat the same exercise with
each of his fingers pressing on top of the quarter. Afterwards, have him pick up the
quarter and rub it along the bridge of his nose. It'll then be really funny to watch him
walk around with a black line on his face.
Go to the local department store clock
department. We would set all the clocks that had alarms to go off within minutes of each
other a few minutes later. From a vantage point, hidden from this area, you can watch as
the alarms started going off and the poor sales clerk tries to find out which one is going
off.
1.Take your Video camera (take someone
else's if you don't have one)
2.Enter your toilet room
3.From the other side of the room to the toilet, stand on a chair and video a shot from
near the ceiling of your toilet seat (about 5 mins should do)
4.Have a party !!
5.When someone leaves the room to visit the lav. put the cassette in your video player.
6.Just before the person re-enters the room start playing the tape - with everyone in the
room laughing at the TV screen.
7.WATCH THE FACE OF THE PERSON RE-ENTERING THE ROOM !!
|
|